I'm doing something big.
June 3rd - June 9th, over 3,000 Cyclists, Roadies and Virtual Cyclists will be participating in AIDS/LifeCycle, a 545-mile bike ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles to raise funds for the life-saving services offered by San Francisco AIDS Foundation and the Los Angeles LGBT Center. We’re working together to make HIV/AIDS a thing of the past.
This year, I’ll be one of them!
Literally & figuratively, I've got a long way to go.
As a participant in LifeCycle I'm celebrating LIFE and the ability to make positive contributions.
This will be my first time doing ANYTHING like this and I feel it's something I am meant to do.
Before college I mountain biked a lot by myself, then after graduation I joined the Montrose Bike Shop team. They introduced me to the world of cyclocross: a fast and intense cross-country form of cycling. It's remained a big part of my life.
Cycling has been my main avenue for coping with all of my most difficult life events; everything from stress and heartbreaks to my illness. In 2013 I was diagnosed with a rare, debilitating condition called cyclic vomiting syndrome. Ever since, my mental and physical health has had many ups and downs, with my family still continuing to support me through everything.
I know firsthand what it is like to live with chronic illness. On my birthday, June 3 2016, I was in a hospital bed. I had planned my birthday for months and I wasn't able to celebrate. Because of my CVS, that year I experienced two sets of week-long hospitalizations, among other hospital admittances, and endless doctor's appointments. Over that Summer I experienced new mental & physical lows. I struggled with chronic fatigue, anxiety and depression. My disease took away my abilities, my joy, my plans.
Coming out of these experiences, my life has changed - I live in the moment now more than I ever have. Every day I wake up with the intent to do things that I love. I know how important it is to hold onto passion; to dream and make plans.
On June 3 2017 I finally celebrated the birthday I was not able to have the year previously, and it was amazing. This year when I turn 27 on June 3 2018, I'm hoping to have an even greater experience, riding out with a group of individuals all coming together to make a difference.
Cycling has given me an amazing sense of confidence in my body and my ability to push myself and reach my own life goals. This will mean so much to me, and I know it will mean even more to the recipients of these funds.
I know how damn important it is to know you have community supporting you no matter what, when your own health and vitality is faltering. This is why I want to get back in the saddle and do something big this year.
This ride will definitely present me with a new challenge.
In 2015 I finished my 80x12 foot mural in Downtown LA. The first time my Mom saw it she said, "It's such a big wall for such a little girl."
I think about this a lot. "Bigger than my body" is an understatement for my life. I so often feel I don't belong anywhere, that I'm too much of a weirdo, and that my dreams are too grandiose and nebulous to even begin my first steps.
I just know I want to do big things. I'm meant to. And maybe by continuing to follow my passions, synchronic things will happen for me and everyone I'm directly and indirectly influencing. That's my heart, that's my dream. I'm here to make my heart stronger.
Despite all the crazy, stupid things that are happening in the world right now, I'm just holding on to the belief that love and goodness will win out, and we will continue to evolve into a better society. And we can so easily be a part of progress.
Stand up for life, and universal love, by making a donation.
My Personal Web Log